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About Darian

Darian Wilk is a published author and freelance writer specializing in women's fiction. Her current titles include:

                                       
REINVENTING CLAIRE
LOVE UNFINISHED


      



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The path I didn't plan on taking...

Mom was 36 when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. I remember on her short treatment days she let me come with her, because by that point I did everything with her. Doctors appointments, tests, treatments. Where she went, I went. Whether she wanted me to or not. The oncologist administered the treatments at his office, in this dingy little room in the basement that looked like death row for cancer patients. Ugly pleather recliners lined the walls of the small room, you could hardly breathe through the dense desperation in the air. As if everyone was just waiting. Waiting to die. At that age, I thought that would never happen to me. As I grew older, I feared that would be me. When I turned 36 I was horrified it would be me; thinking that would be the start of my impending doom. My death sentence. The year I would be diagnosed with breast cancer. But that birthday came and went without a diagnosis, and I almost felt victorious, like I had made it. I had beat this thing that had at...

I can't hear you, what are you even saying??

So God and me, we have this deal you see. I tell him I'll listen to him and trust his plan, but he just has to be very clear and very loud when telling me what to do. You know, because maybe sometimes I'm a little hard of hearing, have headphones on, am a little stubborn, or I'm not listening and just didn't realize it. So I ask him to be loud. Like, really loud, so his voice is louder than all the crap  fluttering through my brain. Sometimes it takes a hot minute, but usually the message gets through, and then I thank him for the help in scooting me along his path. But lately, I'm just not gettin' the message. The last few weeks, either in quiet times, casual reading, Facebook, everywhere, the same verses keep popping up. 2  Dear brothers and sisters, [ a ]  when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy.   3  For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow.   4  So let it grow,...

Goodbye to what I know as me...

So much of what is going on feels out of my control, I'm just doing what I'm told because, well, I don't want to die just yet. Mom and I always had a very open, good relationship. She was my best friend, really, and for a long time, my only friend. There wasn't much we wouldn't share with each other, nothing was off limits. But her cancer, was very private for her. I had to text my brother, because I couldn't remember if she shaved her head either time, and something about not being able to remember that made me feel horrible. I know that she would say how disgusted she was, waking up with literal mouthfuls of hair, and how she looked. But she never said much beyond that, and then one day she just didn't have any hair. My brother told me she shaved it. The first time, I didn't think much of it. She still looked like my mom to me, just bald.  She still had her smile, still had her cackley laugh, she still felt like mom when I hugged her. The second ti...